Mommy of Many®

Happy Father’s Day to all you Daddies!

We have plenty of reason to celebrate over here today. Not only is it Father’s Day and the kids are handing Clay handmade items from school, a cup of coffee & breakfast in bed, but it’s also JJ’s 18th birthday and he just arrived home last night! Big day of celebrating!

JJ graduated from High School a month ago and then headed off with his classmates and a few chaperones to tackle the Pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela. They made this trek by bike over more than 2 weeks. He brought back a couple of newspaper articles that feature the boys sleeping on the street and singing along the way.

We were happy to get him back last night and we’re anxious to hear all the stories he’ll have to tell about this trip!

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On top of all our celebrating, I’ve got to remember to get to bed at a decent time tonight and pack up my exercise mat, hand-weights and some water because tomorrow I join the fastest growing outdoor boot camp Kraze in San Diego-Kraze Boot Camps! I’m still a little nervous about taking this on and yes, I’m worried about being sore and tired, but I’m also really excited about how I’m going to feel as I move through this program! I’m inviting everyone to come out and join me and so far I’ve got one friendly face that’s decided to take on the challenge of getting into a healthier mindset with me-Kateri! Whoo Hoo!

So Happy Father’s Day and Happy Sunday! To the summer!

Once again I’m Doing the Dance of the Children with all 9 kiddos in the house~

The last few days have gotten away from me.

Now that Clay is back and my brother is here and there are more hands and drivers to get the kids where they need to be, I feel like I don’t have a good grasp on everything. When I’m the only one who has to make it all happen, I have it all mapped out and know exactly what has to happen for whom and when. But now it’s all a little cloudy because I don’t have to know all the details. It takes me awhile to adjust to not being the only one in control.

Secretly I’m a control freak- *shhhhhhh* -Imagine keeping it all together if I weren’t!

But I’m letting go of a few pieces of the puzzle and letting Clay and Ted take them over. Don’t worry, there’s still PLENTY for me to do. I just have to get it all clear in my head.

Whew! This ever-changing life…Doing the Dance of the Children~

One year! I’ve gotta be honest-with the 2 visits and the overall busyness of our house and our schedule, it doesn’t AT ALL seem like a year has passed. But I knew that from the beginning. I knew that the way this house works, that everything would just keep rolling the same as always and that all of a sudden Clay would jump back into the routine.

The best part is that things really will keep rolling the same. Clay’s next set of orders are right here in San Diego. He gets to spend 3 years as a flight instructor at a training squadron at North Island. A beautiful set of orders!

So, today will be spent with the kids asking me a million times, “is it time to get Dad yet?” and by making Welcome Home signs, finishing up projects around the house and reminding that kids that 11pm is much, MUCH later.

Thank you for all the support by all the wonderful people who helped keep life rolling smoothly over this last year. I TRULY appreciate all the supportive comments and those that stepped in to help get kiddos to events and the chit chat over glasses of wine. THAT’S what I call community! Thank you!

Have a great day~

1 dad home before deployment

1 visiting uncle

1 lawnmower

1 weed whacker

One 15-passenger van

14 people

1 birthday

2 trips to the beach

16 hot dogs 

8 grilled chicken breasts

2 salmon steaks

3 bags of asparagus risotto

2 lbs of broccoli

1 ice cream, birthday cake

2 half gallons of ice cream

2 loads of after-dinner dishes

15 teenagers playing soccer in the street after dark

1 movie

1 late-night round of fresh squeezed lemonade

1 queen-sized inflatable mattress

4 extra people, sleeping, scattered throughout my house

This is what yesterday looked like at the Lang house.  This morning I’m moving through a quiet house, full of sleeping people and picking up the remnants of what the girls found to do after I’d already gone to bed.  I turned off the movie that had been playing all night, wiped up the stickiness from the lemonade they’d made and started load 3 of the dishes from last night. 

I love summer!

Have a great day~

If there’s one thing I’ve learned while living the life of a military spouse, it’s that surprises are par for the course.  You really never know exactly what’s going to happen, even when the plans are laid out before you.  

We are one month into this year-long deployment and Clay’s 3 week’s of training in Washington got stretched out a little bit and he’s not actually heading overseas until the last day of this month.  HOWEVER, training has ended and he’s left with a few extra days on his hands.  He’s decided to spend them here.  Yup….as I type, he’s on a plane, heading home for a few days.  Kateri (who’s not home for the summer) and JJ, both know, but the other kids will all wake to a surprise visit from Daddy!  

I’m taking full advantage of this and have my “honey-do” list all prepared.  It’s surprising how many things can pop up in only a month’s time.  Yes, being in military housing means that many, many things are taken care of with a phone call, but there are always those little things that can’t get done until Dad gets home.  So, he will be kept busy!  ;-)

I’ll let you know how it goes.

Good night~

And so it begins.  After some changes to the original plan of Clay leaving on the 17th, he has now officially boarded a plane.  He gave the kids his best “Dad” talk, grabbed his sea bag and began his deployment.  The kids are remarkably good with his coming and going.  I’m the constant in the house and always have been and they know that everything’s “ok” as long as I’m around.  People have asked, over the years, how they do with the deployments and other than a few bumps here and there, they just keep rollin’.

So, now it’s all me.  My head has been so crammed with all that needed to happen to get him out the door successfully that I left the airport realizing I didn’t know what my next move was.  I headed to Target to retrieve the bag of stuff I bought last night, but had forgotten to actually pick up and take with me (a good example of my scattered head) and realized that it’s time to get my routine going.  It’s the end of the school year, so that means lots of kid stuff and then summer is on us.  Judging from last summer (when Clay was also deployed), the summer will be jam packed and move quickly.  JJ will come home and the kids and I will get into a good routine of searching out the fun things around us in this beautiful place.

Alright, off the computer and onto the day! Day 1……..

It’s been Go! Go! Go! at the Lang house for the last week.  All the kiddos were home so that we could celebrate Easter as a “whole” family (in Max’s words).  We had 5 days together before Kateri had to head back to school.  We are lucky enough to have JJ for a few more days.  The little kids really get a lot out of having the oldest kids home.  And I must say that Kateri and JJ do a great job of making sure to give the little kids extra attention, when they are home. Here are some pictures and descriptions of what’s kept the Lang Clan busy over the last week-

This pair of ducks showed up last week and the kids have been enjoying them, ever since.  They spend the day resting on our front lawn.  They wander the neighborhood for their daily exercise and then show up at our front door to let the kids know they’d like some more attention.  It’s been a lot of fun for the kids!

JJ loaded up the 4 youngest kiddos and took them on a bike ride to the store for kites.  Then he took them to an open area (not pictured) to fly them.  Here, one of them is being flown over our house.

Kateri and JJ helping the kite back into the air.

We attended an Easter party and egg hunt at a local park.

Luke-Xavier finding eggs

Gabi, on the run to find some eggs!

Max’s, Happy Egg Hunting face!

Clay with some of the kids and a friend, goofing around at the park.

The younger kids enjoyed coloring eggs to give to the Easter Bunny.  Kateri lent a hand and the ducks came to keep an eye on things.

Of course there was Easter, itself.  It’s a time of celebration and remembrance for us.  We attended Easter Sunday Liturgy and then went to one of our favorite places, The Island Club, for brunch.  It was a beautiful day!  We really could not have asked for better weather!

The kids woke to their filled baskets.

JJ and Tristan helped to serve Easter Liturgy

The whole Lang Clan on Easter Sunday.  It was a beautiful day and it was so nice to have everyone together!  With Clay’s upcoming deployment, this will have been the last time that the family was able to be together for a little more than a year.  So, we took the time to enjoy it!

As you can see, it’s been a flurry of activity at the Lang house.  I love it!

Have a great day~

This evening we took the kids to an event, put on by the Family Readiness Group (FRG), that was at our local Chuck E. Cheese.  The kids had a great time and being a week night, the place was almost empty.  We used to take the older kids to Chuck E. Cheese every once in awhile, but as they’ve grown and the younger kiddos have come along, we’ve found ourselves going less and less.  This event had me thinking about those days when I would clip coupons and look for a great deal for a family day out.  All this thinking led me to remember a paper that Clay wrote on the very subject and with his permission I am going to reprint it here.  It was written about 4 years ago which means that Luke-Xavier, who enjoyed himself immensely tonight, hadn’t even joined the family yet!

First, here are a few pics of the kiddos having fun

the boys with Chuck E.

Luke-Xavier using ALL the blue sprinkles on his cookie

Clay, caught enjoying his time at Chuck E. Cheese

Enjoy the story!

It was a lazy, late Sunday morning at the Lang household.  We were in and out of Church early.  My obligations for the day were fulfilled.  I was looking forward to a quiet afternoon of couch, chips and collisions.  The collision part meaning playoff football.  My wife, Jenni, was clipping coupons out of the Sunday paper.  My last peaceful moment of the day was broken with Jenni’s exclamation, “hey, a coupon.”

Still not quite knowing that my peaceful universe was about to be shredded, I replied with a well meaning, if slightly sarcastic, “Well, honey, that IS what you are doing, right?  Clipping coupons?”  “Well, yes, but this one gave me an idea,” my beautiful bride innocently replied.

Warning alarms blared in my head.  In my marital experience “I have an idea” ranks up there with “I’ve been thinking.”  I quickly switched over to survival mode, slowly, surreptitiously, sinking into the couch.  My attention switched to overdrive; suddenly everything Howie Long had to say was of global importance.  My survival depended on it.  Please Howie, take me away!  I had become a fox, securely hidden in the remotest depths of my den.

My bride, having a bit of marital experience as well, quickly turned into a foxhound and charged into my den, dragging me back out.  “No, this is really a good idea,” she bayed.  With a morbid fascination compelling me to ascertain the instrument of my destruction, I asked the question, “Ok, what is your idea?”

“Well, this coupon is a, “buy a large deluxe pizza, get another for free.”  Plus, you get 40 free tokens,” she started…. Tokens?  I thought, Pizza?  That could only mean…  “At Chuck-E-Cheese,” she finished.  “So I was thinking (first, an idea and now, thinking – I’m hosed), being you don’t have anything going on, why don’t you take the kids?”

OH SHT!  I panicked.  Well, I would love to take them honey.  Except I just accidentally jammed both my thumbs into my eyes and swirled them around in the sockets so actually I have to go to the hospital now.  Or maybe I could just lay here on the couch and recover; perhaps I could just listen to the game until the pain goes away.  No, that won’t work Clay.  Nope, the best defense is a great offense.  Remember who you are:  Lieutenant Commander Clay Lang.  Naval Aviator, Ranger School graduate, Reconnaissance Marine, member of the team who took down the soccer stadium in Mogadishu, bringer of stability and security to East Timor, the man who flew into the pitch black dark to rescue (wait, I already told you that one), and most importantly, the Lord and Master of my domain.  Time to bring the offense and exert some AUTHORITY around here.

“HEEELLL No!”  I exploded.  “If you think that I’m going to give up my day off, my chance at a couple of beers and playoff football to go to some commercialized pizza joint run by a big rat you need to think again.”  I told her.  And now for the finale – I’ll sure tell her, “Take the kids to Chuck-E-Cheese, you must be out of your dang mind!”

So I’m driving the kids to the Chuck-E-Cheese on Sports Arena Drive.  I have shoe horned all eight children into the Suburban – sometimes I think I am the only person in San Diego who has a legitimate requirement for a full-sized SUV.  There is some initial squabbling about who sits where, but I quickly rectify that by breaking out the seating chart.  I am still hopeful that there will be some ruckus that will enable me to at least threaten to turn the car around, but my luck has already been shattered by a coupon in the Sunday paper.  The eerie, uncannily quiet trip is one I would imagine being similar to the last stroll of a Death Row Inmate.

We arrive.  That commercialized, magical place where “a kid can be a kid.”  And a parent can lose his mind.  The kids have already run ahead and by the time I arrive they are being held at the end of a long entrance area, the “safety stop.”  Security checkpoint, I thought as the fraulein in the green and red polyester getup begins her interrogation.  “Are these all yours?” she asks.  “Yes, but there have been rumors.”  I innocently reply.  There is no mistaking them for my children as they all have one common trait, the it just got flattened with a frying pan, nose.  She looks up at me from under her ring-adorned eyebrows.  She is not amused.  What do I care?  I thought.  I’m not the one wearing a hat with a big rat on it.  Eager to strengthen our new bond, I ask her while she is affixing matching plastic security bracelets if they ever thought of just micro chipping everyone.  After receiving the “gee, I’ve never heard that one before” look, I decide it’s time to move to the register.

Ordering time.  A few pizzas, drinks for everyone, and let’s not forget, more tokens.  And the total is – wait I have a coupon – sixty-five dollars.  As I shell out the cash, I notice a birthday party winding down.  Much of the food has been left, the kids have been too busy running around, losing their minds.  Even half the cake is left.  I humorously ask if I can cancel my order and just take over where they left off.  I again get the look beneath the big rat hat.  She hasn’t heard that one before, either.

Now the fun begins.  As I try to herd the kids into a yet unbussed booth large enough for everyone I spy a recently vacated high chair belonging to a family preparing to depart.  I politely ask if they are done with it.  Again, the look.  At this point I am starting to wonder if I have an enormous phallus growing straight out of my forehead.  “When we’re done with it,” I’m chastised.  As I go to check on my children, the family departs and a mom quickly swoops in on the high chair.  I’m out of luck.  Well I’ll just hold Gabbi (age 1) I thought, as I turn the kids loose to play.

Mayhem.  Absolute mayhem.  As Kateri (my oldest) divvies up the loot (tokens), everyone takes off in a different direction.  I try to take a minute to appraise my surroundings.  Yelling, screaming, pushing, shoving.  Kids walking up the ramp of the game were you roll the balls into the holes.  They are dropping the ball into the 800-point slot so they can win more tickets.  Maddi (age 7), hollers down from the top of the play structure that someone threw up in there.  I put Gabbi, the contortionist, down so I can check if Maddi has crawled through someone’s yak.  Max (3), is walking from video game to video game, putting in a token and walking away.  Tristan (6), wants to ride on the little four-seater merry-go-round.  There is a girl on it who is screaming that it’s her ride and she doesn’t want anyone else on; her mother explains to Tristan and another boy that they can’t ride until her daughter is done.  Max has put half his tokens in the machines and given the other half away.  He wants more.  Gabbi is trying to sit next to a little girl on a mechanical two-seater car.  Her dad takes Gabbi by the arm to pull her off.  We lock eyes.  He lets her go.  Gabbi runs past the security checkpoint.  The fraulein is off flirting with a couple of young men in Raiders hats and baggy pants, sporting their ink – Boyz in the Chuck-E-Cheese.  I see a woman changing a diaper on the floor right next to the play structure.  I pick up Gabbi; she’s ripe.  I tell Kateri she’s in charge – good luck – as I head towards the restroom.  I already know there won’t be a “diaper deck” in there like there is in the Women’s restroom.  Arianna (9), is playing a driving game.  A little boy runs up and grabs the wheel.  His father, a heartbeat behind, collects him.  He tells the boy it is not his turn yet and looks at me apologetically.  I ask, “you get sent here with a coupon too?”  Finally, an understanding laugh.

Pizza is here. By the time I load the platoon into the booth, the pizza is scarcely warm.  Across from me I see a chubby girl.  The pizza she is eating is sending down rivulets of translucent orange fat down her cheek, culminating into a large droplet under her chin.  If this were Alaska, she would be forming an orange icicle.  Her parents tell her if she doesn’t eat her food, she can’t go play.  My appetite is gone.  What am I doing here?  Why here instead of the half-dozen, half-empty parks we passed on the way?  Wouldn’t even need a coupon.  Unfortunately, it wouldn’t have flown with the kids.  For the umpteenth time, I eye the beer and wine on tap at the register.  I wonder if they could just run a hose from the tap to my booth.

Back to the mayhem.  More running around.  More settling disputes.  More tears.  More tokens.  Finally, mercifully, the tokens run out.  Now comes the hard part.  What pieces of worthless, made in Taiwan, crap do we buy with all these tickets?  For one, a whistle (it will never make it home). Another, a kazoo (ditto).  Next, a clacker (refer to the whistle and kazoo).  A plastic slinky, a rubber snake (this one WILL make it home, in fact, it will find its way under Jenni’s pillow).  JJ (12), wants to save up his tickets for a cool pen.  I pay the difference now.  There is no way I want to leave with any incentive to return.  Now we’re off to the security checkpoint.  Fraulein peels herself off gangster number one to make sure all my children are still mine.  She looks upset that I interfered with her romance.  I feel bad – not!

The ride home is much more reassuring than the ride to.  I now have the kids that I am accustomed to.  Gabbi has already fallen asleep in her car seat.  Max is right behind.  It is hard to believe that I have just spent sixty-five bucks when I could have experienced just as much mayhem by simply taking them for a car ride.  What is it with that place?  I ask myself.  It’s simple.  The countless commercials embedded in every kid show.  The smiling faces, fabulous games and prizes, wonderful food, singing and dancing creatures.  I only wish they would show the other side:  The vomit, the grease, the junk.  Three out of eight toys have already been broken.  Now I will just need to intercept a couple more before they make it to the house.

The answer is ridiculously simple; parent guilt.  The continual feeling that not only are we obligated to do everything within our mental and physical (and let’s not forget fiscal) ability, but that if we do not, then we are setting them up for almost certain failure down the road.  When you couple that with the simple fact that parents will spend outrageous amounts of money on their children (my friend has a personal trainer for his ten-year-old son), you end up with an extremely effective marketing tool.  The formula is brilliant.  Three easy steps:  1. Inundate every show that children watch (even those that they are not supposed to, but researches show that they do) with advertising.  2. Sit back and let the pleadings of the children mix with the guilt of the parents.  3.  Count the money as it rolls in hand over fist.  And as a bonus, throw in a coupon and you’ll reel in some more.  I feel more than a bit sheepish as we drive past those same half-empty parks on the way home.  What does it matter that you saved twenty when you still spent sixty-five?

Mom gets the unrated version as the children stream into the house.  Someone puked in the play structure.  Max gave all his tokens away.  A girl wouldn’t let Tristan ride the merry-go-round.  I get the “what were you doing if you weren’t supervising the children?” look.  Since she is six months pregnant with our ninth, I am happy to give her a little peace and quiet at home.  If only it didn’t involve Chuck-E-Cheese.  I almost feel guilty about the one good thing that came out of that place – the rubber snake in my back pocket – almost.  She often comments that I am nothing but a big kid myself.  Who am I to prove her wrong?  This is my home, where a kid can be a kid.

Slowly, the caffeinated beverages wear off on the children and we are able to get them off to bed.  Only two complained of stomachaches, so for that we are fortunate.  Later that night as I watch news clips of the great game I missed on Sports Center, Jenni comments, “When I was putting Tristan to bed he told me that he wants to have his birthday party at Chuck-E-Cheese.”

OH SHIT!  I panicked.  “What?  I don’t care if it is double coupon day for his birthday.  The last thing you are going to do is to get me to throw Tristan’s birthday party there.  I’d rather throw a pool party at a leper colony.  Throw Tristan’s birthday party at Chuck-E-Cheese.  You must be out of your dang mind!”

Since I’m out and about and trying to Do the Dance of Life, I find that my head is very full and busy.  So much got put on the back burner in the last month, that trying to play catch up is making my head spin.  I’m falling back on my list making skills to get me through.  

Easter is around the corner and we are finishing up the travel arrangements to get Kateri and JJ home for the break.  This will be the last time that either of them get to spend time with Clay until he returns from deployment, next year.  I know a year sounds like a really long time and that a lot happens in a year’s time, but it seems like they fly by and I’m feeling confident that it’s going to seem like the blink-of-an-eye before we are talking about next Easter and Clay’s return. But between now and the day he leaves, there are so many things that have to be done.  There’s so much to prepare for that we don’t want to have deal with when he’s not actually here to make the phone calls of sign the papers.  It’s always hard to think about things like the kids’ future from far away.  

Next year, JJ will be in his Senior year of high school and Clay won’t be back until just before JJ’s graduation, so we have to think about planning for college NOW.  It’s stuff like that, that keeps me adding to the lists and worrying that I’m forgetting something.  

Well, today, I just need to make the lists and focus on today.  So, pen and paper are at the ready and one step at a time, one day at a time and it’ll all fall into place.

Right? (this is where you all chime in with statements of agreement!)

Have a great day~

The other night I was with a group of great ladies and we were chit chatting about life.  We got on the subject of organizing our houses and how we like things done and how our husbands are often times clueless about where things go or how we like things put away, folded, organized, etc.  This ultimately ends up in our doing all the work or being frustrated when things aren’t done “right”.  BTW this isn’t only about husbands, but older children, as well.  So, the workload of the house ends up on Mom’s shoulders and leads to us feeling like no one can do it except us.  Guess what ladies?  It’s our job to TEACH them how we like it done!  It does no good to simply be frustrated!  If we want help and we want it done our way, then we have to take on the task of guiding the older kids and the husbands through the way the house works.  Over the years I’ve found that the work can be divided up and I can still get the results I desire, by taking the time to explain why I fold the towels a certain way or where I keep the unfolded socks.  The members of our families aren’t as unwilling to help us as we think.  However, they know that we DO have a certain way we want things done and they’d rather do nothing than make us upset by doing it wrong.  

I found out that Clay was perfectly willing to help put clean laundry away in the kids’ rooms, but had no idea what drawer things went into.  A little time and a few labels later, I can count on him to get Luke-Xavier’s shirts and pants into the correct drawers.  

Let’s stop being frustrated and take a little time to guide everyone in how it works.

Have a great day!

Yesterday I was able to take the lil ones to watch Clay fly.  It was a beautiful day for it!  I hadn’t taken the kids to watch him fly in a long time.  There’s an outlook off the freeway where you can watch helicopters load ships.  What a great combination; blue skies, the ocean, and watching Daddy do his exciting job!

people watching the vertrep action from the outlook 

Clay’s helo and the ship that was being replenished

The helo gettting loaded

Gabi and Lex watching the action

All the fresh air and excitement wore them out!

Have a great day~

Yesterday we celebrated Gabi’s 4th birthday. I can’t believe she’s already 4! Maddi, who’s very thoughtful and loves to plan special things, set the table for a party and then made a nice breakfast. We got to celebrate for Gabi from the moment she woke up. She was pleased!

After a full and busy day, we celebrated with a “pink, princess” cake.

Clay has taken some leave so that he can focus on being back home and spend some time with all of us. He took the 2 little ones to the park for a little “Dad” time. They had fun!

However, Dad being home also means work. Clay built this gravel box before he left, but we didn’t have time to line and fill it. While he was gone, the weeds took over and I turned a blind-eye to it. He got the kids rallied to clear out the weeds and get it ready for the gravel. I can’t believe how hard they worked! Sometimes I wonder if they realize we don’t live in the country! They were filthy and happy by the time it was cleared out.

It’s been a productive and happy time. The kids are really taking in as much of Clay as they can. It’s nice to have all the things that I didn’t take care of (clearing weeds, changing the battery in the truck, etc.) looked at and fixed!

Have a great day~