Mommy of Many®

I LOVE this!!!!

Max came home on the 1st day of school and told me about this system in his classroom. His teacher also explained it to me and let me know that Max was already using the “Compliment Card” and the “Breaking News!” forms. In the last couple of days Max has received Compliment Cards from classmates. He’s LOVING this! Even better are the Breaking News! forms, because it enables a kiddo like Max, who has a really tough time NOT speaking his mind the very moment an idea or story pops into his head, to jot down what he has to say and to feel confident that when the teacher or parent who gets the form, has time, they will give it proper attention.

Max’s teacher let me know that he promptly grabbed a stack of each form, to be ready for when he would need them. Today he brought some home so I could utilize this great system at home.

The third form is “Tattling Turtle” and is to be used when a child feels upset about something or is having a problem with someone or something. GREAT! Now, if I can make a zillion copies, wallpaper the walls of my home in them, hand each kiddo a pencil and listen to their closed mouths and scribbling pencils! If only~

Seriously, I love the idea of this program for all kids, not just my super verbal, “I’ve got an idea”, Asperger’s kiddo. I hope he uses the forms at school AND at home and I’m open to my other kiddos using them too!

Here’s to great ideas that bring the hope of a little peace in the home and classroom!

Doing the Dance of the Children and Always Searching for a Better Way~

This morning I saw a post on Facebook referencing an article on large families and whether or not it was “greedy” to have multiple children. Of course, I went straight over to read the article. I encourage you to do the same-here. When I saw it was written by The Feminist Breeder, I was cautious. Why? Because as the mother of a large family I’ve been berated on more than one occasion by women who call themselves feminists. They seem to forget that they fight hard for the right of ALL women to choose what they do with their bodies and when they are faced with a woman who has chosen to use her body to welcome life-as many times as God chose to bless it on them, they recoil. BUT, I read it anyway. And I’d like to give The Feminist Breeder kudos for standing up for mothers who choose to make the decision to go outside the societal “norm”.  We should not be hindered by societies’ views on how big or small our families “should” be.

As far as being “greedy”, I’m fairly certain that anyone who thinks having ANY number of children is a greedy decision, hasn’t been down in the trenches of raising those children into adulthood. Sure, I love to see the love in my little one’s eyes when I’m their sun and moon and I suppose people could figure that I kept having children so that I could build a small community of people who adore me. But then there’s reality and those adoring little fans grow into preteens and teens that find you wrong on most accounts and who readily let you know that you don’t do enough for them and even if you are doing “enough” for them, you’re not doing it correctly. They are expensive and demanding and I lose almost as much sleep over the teens as I lose when they’re infants. So, I’m poor, have no time for myself and I’m sleep-deprived. Show me where my greed lies.

Doing the Dance of the Children~

Max is a thinker. He’s constantly pondering everything and always coming up with the “best” way to get things done. He creates and theorizes in his head continually. There’s nothing he leaves “as is”. To his way of thinking, everything can be improved, everyone can be better and there are clear-cut ways of making this happen. He’s also a talker. So all day long I hear all these thoughts and ideas because he’s sharing them. He asks MANY MANY questions and is always very black and white with things. There’s just no middle ground in Max’s head. There’s right and wrong and nothing else. So one of yesterday’s questions was a real tough one for him to understand;

Max-”Mom, those people who throw knives at people when they’re being spun on a board, if they miss and the person dies, do they still get to go to Heaven?”.

I know this sounds like a funny question, but in Max’s mind he could not understand how someone could choose to participate in an activity where someone could be killed, if it meant it was their fault and ultimately put their soul in jeopardy.

I explained that it isn’t real, that it’s all illusion and trickery and just for show. We went round and round, him telling me that the audience is shown the knives, the front and back of the board and that it is surely real. I further explained that the fact that these performers are able to get the audience to believe it’s real means that they’re really good at what they do, but that no matter, it isn’t real and that no one dies…ever.

Explaining trickery to a kiddo with Aspergers is no easy task! There is no trickery! There is only what is and what isn’t. Try as I might, to explain it all away, I know that Max fell asleep wondering how anyone could do such a thing and risk so much for a performance.

Poor kid! I’ll keep trying to help him see that in life there is surely right and wrong, black and white, but that we often live in shades of grey.

Doing the Dance of the Children~

I have 4 teenagers. 3 of them are still at home. My 2 oldest children have been out of the house for more than 4 years because of schooling and my oldest in is her 20′s. I consider myself pretty well seasoned on raising and staying-out-of-the-way of teens. It’s the time in their lives where they’re gaining more independence and the goal is that they will come out of their teens with a sense of responsibility for themselves, their actions and the life they have ahead of them. I’ve learned a lot about letting go, both of expectations and of physically letting them go-leave the family home and stretch out into the wide world, whether it be for school or for travel. By trial and error, love and frustration, fear and hope, I’ve learned a lot and the #1 thing I’ve learned is to check-check everything! When they say they have plans with a friend, make a phone call, touch-base with the other teen’s parents and make sure that the plans have been approved on both ends. Make sure the plans have even been made at all! Teens are crafty! They find all the ways they can to get what they want and they BELIEVE they should be able to do and have what they want. They believe in the idea of “Beg forgiveness instead of asking permission”. They believe that if they push hard enough or insist long enough that they will get what they want. They also believe that what you don’t know won’t hurt you, or them. As a parent this means you have to be on your toes! Listen for the voice inflections, the key words and the details that have been left out. If it doesn’t make sense, it probably isn’t being given to you with 100% honesty. And the BEST way to make sure of all of these things is to call the other people or the other people’s parent’s who are to be involved.

I’ve been making, somewhat awkward, phone calls for about 10 years now. “Hi, this is Mrs. Lang, so and so’s mom. I just wanted to check in and make sure of the time of the movie the girls are going to see and to be sure that I have the driving arrangement correct. Thanks.” Or “Hi, this is Mrs. Lang. so and so is not answering their phone, but they told me they were going to be spending the afternoon with you and it’s now time for them to be dropped off at home, like they told me they would be. If there’s any questions or if there’s a problem with this, please call me back or have so and so call me back. I will be calling your Mom/Dad/Grandma/Older sibling after I hang up from this message, to make sure everyone is aware of the plan. Thank you.”

Yeah, I’m not much fun! I get yelled at by my teens because “No one’s parent’s call MY PHONE asking about their kid”. Well, maybe they should! Come on…if this weren’t a necessary task, to keep my kids somewhat honest and safe, I certainly wouldn’t be doing it! I am convinced that one of the biggest deterrents from trouble is being caught or the genuine fear of being caught.

So there you have it! I call my kid’s friends and friend’s parents when I’m feeling unsure of what’s going on. And I’m going to keep doing it! I have 9 kids that have been put in my care and I plan on pulling out whatever tools I have available to me, to keep them safe and help them move into adulthood.

Call me a meddling mom. Be angry at me for calling. Go ahead and think it’s sad that I “don’t trust” my kids and feel the need to check up on them. Go ahead!

Doing the Dance of the Children-Of All Ages~

Music can be so powerful and a key to many emotions.

Max has always been really in-tune to music. Even as a really small kiddo, he’d let me know if he wanted to hear a song or if it brought up strong emotions and he wanted me to change it. The song “Jamaica Farewell”, sung by Harry Belafonte, was one he had particularly strong feelings about. He’d listened to the words and decided they were just too sad to listen to. Within the first few notes of a song, he knows if it interests him or not.

Recently I decided that when he and I are alone in the car (or at least without the older kids, who don’t enjoy this) that we should play a game-I hit the seek button on the radio and he tells me whether to stop or keep going. What we’ve found is that he really enjoys Jazz, Classical and Big Band music. He’s mostly drawn to music without words. The words seem to get in the way of what the music has to say to him. This is the boy that told me that sometimes if you listen to the wind, you can hear the music in it. So, we’ve been playing this game and when we stop on Jazz or Big Band music, he takes time to listen to each instrument and identify it. He’s actually really good at hearing each of them. And if we stop on a classical piece, he tells me the story as it’s happening.

This has been such a great little game for us that lets Max show me a piece of him that I can appreciate. And amazingly, I’ve noticed that no matter who’s in the car, if we’re listening to classical music, no one complains. Good Stuff!

I will continue to nurture Max’s love of music and after our move I intend to get him back in piano lessons. I think this will be a great way for him to express himself.

Doing the Dance of the Children and Listening to the Music Along the Way~

This week was packed with lots of Kid Stuff-kids to Balboa Park, kids to the beach, kids to softball practice, kids to softball game, kids to the movies, kids to visit with Auntie and their cousin, kids to the park, kids to the pool, kids to birthday party, kids to bed, kids to church.

It came and went without me getting to dig into the work that’s been piling up. So after church today I declared myself “off” so that I could grab my laptop and bag full of work and head out into this BEAUTIFUL San Diego day to try to be in the sunshine, feel the ocean breeze and still tackle some of this stuff. It’s a funny job Mom’s have-we have to take time off of 1 job just to get the time to do another. I have to quit this work by 4:45 so I can run home to get dinner going and tackle some of the ever-present laundry so that the kids are uniform-ready to get back to school tomorrow. Doing the Dance, Doing the Dance, Ever Doing the Dance of the Children!

On top of all the stuff I’ve been letting slide over here, last night I was visiting with a friend and she asked me if I’d had experience with my kids on Tumblr or Omegle. I think I’d heard of Tumblr, but Omegle struck no bell in me at all. So today I asked my girls if they’d heard of or had any experience with either site. Two of them said they’d heard of Tumblr. One said she’d been on it once to check out a friend’s post. But none seemed to know anything about Omegle. My oldest said she hadn’t heard of or used either. I’m glad!

I went over to check both sites out. Tumblr didn’t strike me as much different from other social sites. You can read peoples’ postings and they seem to be listed by category, which is helpful if you’re looking to read about certain topics. But I didn’t find anything particularly outstanding or alarming about the site. Then I checked out Omegle. Uh…as a parent I’d say it’s alarming from the start. The tag line is-”Talk to Strangers”. Yeah, that makes me uncomfortable. There was no sign-up process. You just choose to start talking (or videoing!) and the site randomly connects you with someone. Each new chat seems to start with the other person asking “asl?” and no, they aren’t asking if you are fluent in American Sign Language. So right from the get-go they want your personal info-age, sex and location. No thank you!

I’d love to hear if any of you have experience with these sites. Have your kids been involved with them? How do you feel? I find Omegle scary from a parent’s stand point. Honestly I find it scary from any stand point.

Doing the Dance of the Children and Trying to Keep Them Safe~

I decided to put a new tab on the site.

You’ll now find a tab for Asperger’s. As I was reading through older posts, I realized I’d been chronicling our journey since last year, but didn’t know what I was facing. Those posts and anything that will directly pertain to Max’s education and what the family and I learn as good tools will appear there.

It was interesting for me to go back and see how school (1st grade) was such a struggle and we just couldn’t figure out why-Stubborness? Poor dynamic with the teacher? Depression? I’m so grateful for Max’s teacher, this year, who has been so dedicated to helping Max and finding out exactly what his strengths and weaknesses are and helping me to get the answers we now have!

More to come.

Onto better things for Max and all of us!

Doing the Dance of the Children~

Here is the conversation Max and I had right before his last counseling appointment;

Max-”Mom, can I ask you something?”
Me-”Sure”
Max-”So, about that Asperger’s thing…Do I have it?”
Me-”Well, all the tests you took have come back and, yes, it shows that you do.”
Max-”I thought so but I was hoping not.”
Me-”But that’s why we’re here, to get better tools for all of us to help know how to do things the best way for you. That way being in school won’t be so hard. But don’t worry! You’re still the same YOU.”
Max-Gave me a big hug and just smiled.

Later that afternoon he asked if I would call all his classmates parents and tell them so they could explain it to their kids so that the kids could understand. I assured him that I would let his teacher have all the test results and that she would be able to help his classmates understand better.

As you can see, I’m making sure to keep the communication with Max open. I don’t want him sitting around and wondering what’s going on. Hopefully this will make all our future steps easier and more clear.

Doing the Dance of the Children~

Parenting many different ages of kids can really be tricky. There are plenty of times that I have trouble figuring out how to make something work for everyone. But one thing I’ve learned that always works best is to set aside my emotions and turn on my brain. I said it works best, I didn’t say I’m always capable of doing it. But today-today I did just that.

One of the kids came running in to let me know that they’d been “kicked off” the computer by an older sibling and that the older sib had then put a password on the computer so that the younger one couldn’t get back on. I approached the teen and asked why they did it. They had decided that, even though I had given the younger kiddo permission to be on the computer, that they felt that the younger sibling needed to focus on different activities. I then explained that I gave permission for using the computer and that I wanted  the computer logged back on for the younger sib. I was told “no”.

How’s that?

“No”. She let me know that not only would she NOT log the computer back on, she also refused to give me the new password. You can imagine the steam that began coming out of my ears! I explained that she had no right to override my parenting and to decide to take that kind of control. She still refused. You can also imagine that I wanted to snap!

But instead, I walked away, sat down, turned off my anger and turned on my brain. Ok-teen is NOT going to give in and I’m going to get angrier which will only end badly. Where is my power? I can’t force her into chores. I can’t even demand that she not leave the house (we can go into those things another time) but I CAN decide that she will NOT drive ANY vehicle for the next week. She’s still working with her permit and without anger, I can take away a privilege. I emailed her father to ask that he be on-board with my punishment, and why and then walked out to calmly let her know what the consequences of her actions would be.

Once I delivered that news I turned to the younger sibling and told him to follow me to my computer where I would log him on and set a timer.

M.O.M. Brain=Good Stuff! I am not as powerless in the face of difficult kiddos as I sometimes feel.

Doing the Dance of the Children~

Prizes. Rewards. Treats. Extra Food.

All these good things are worked for/desired/asked for by most kiddos. If you offer something special it’s going to grab their attention. My 8 yr old is certainly no exception!

But lately I’ve noticed that he shows up to the van, after school, with something “special” almost everyday. I’m learning to clue into this phenomenon and ask lots of questions.

We’ve just recently gotten the test results back that show that he falls quite strongly into the Aspergers Spectrum. This has opened my eyes and ears in new ways. While I’ve always known my own child’s tendencies, I’m realizing that because of some of his social challenges that he doesn’t pick up on all the normal cues that other children give. Now when he shows up with something “special” and says that someone has given it to him, I have to run through a list of questions to get down to the nitty gritty of EXACTLY why someone “gave” him something special. This is exhausting! Not only is it exhausting, I worry that he thinks I don’t trust him. I’m learning a delicate dance of finding out the EXACT facts and helping him understand that I don’t want anyone to be angry with him and that I’m just checking.

Today he showed up with a kite. He had talked about this kite a few days ago and had said that he hoped to earn it for Lex (his 5yr old brother). When I saw it I immediately asked how he got it. When he told me that a classmate had earned it and in turn had given it to him to give to his little brother, my Mommy Gauges went into overdrive. “Grab it and lets go find him”. Where my words.

“But Mom! He really DID give it to me.”

“Oh, I’m sure he did. I just want to make sure that he meant to. I don’t want someone to be upset about their decision to give away their special prize.”

Long story short-we found the classmate with his mom and he confirmed that he, did in-fact, give the kite to be given to Lex.

Ok then. Thanks were passed to the kiddo and we headed back to your van. I made sure to let Max know that I was proud of him for thinking of his little brother and that I really wanted to make sure that no one ended up upset.

A delicate dance indeed!

I guess I’ll just keep double checking.

Doing the Dance of the Children and Learning the Steps as I Go~

It’s Friday! We’re all looking forward to a little break in our regular routines and hopefully we have something fun planned in the next couple of days. Your mind starts getting ready for a little ease to the daily grind. You take a big breath and sit back in the car/van/mini van/ suburban/etc while you wait for the kids to get out of school and load up.

They get in the car and it’s an immediate stream of all that went wrong for the day. Of course you have to decipher the Code of Kid Talk before you realize that they were not their best at school, and your little bit of peaceful brain time and the hopes of starting the weekend and easing up on the schedule and routine and thinking of fun stuff just went out the window. Instead you must talk to them, find out what went wrong and how to make it better.

Oh yeah, don’t forget that you have to get one of them to work and then go back to pick them up at 11pm for the next 2 days. Weekend?! Relaxing?! Easing up?! Yeah right!

You’re a parent! This may not be your exact scenario, but I’ll bet that if you wear the label of Parent that the weekend and your hopes of any relaxation and ease are dashed by the kids’ sporting events you will be attending or the birthday party you need to rush out and get a gift for, etc.

That’s right moms and dads, we are ON IT, round the clock, 365 days a year. No breaks! So, forget Friday. It’s not for you. Get back in there and begin the work of the weekend!

Doing the Dance of the Children~

Today at school I heard one of the teachers tell Lex to go blow his nose and wash his hands. He told her that he already blew his nose and all that came out were boogers. I told him to go into the classroom and I’d help him. Here’s our conversation once we were there;

Lex-I already blew it, but there’s something hard in there and only boogers are coming out.

Me-I’ll help you. Just blow really hard.

Lex-There’s a little green thing in there.

Me-(suddenly many thoughts went through my head, but what I said was…)Did you put a little green thing up your nose?

Lex-Yes

Me-Where?

Lex-In my classroom

Me-Ok. Blow really hard!

Out comes a small, oblong piece of plastic.

Lex-Oh good! That hurt!

Doing the Dance of the Children~

Normal-it’s what we all strive for. It’s what we’re “supposed” to be. It’s all the people around us-or so we perceive. Normal is what my kids said today’s lunches were, because I included cheese puffs (never mind that they were wheat free, gluten free, contain no corn syrup or msg) and trail mix.

Normal-we all think it’s pretty important.

Well, it’s what I’m needing to let go of. I chuckle at myself for even saying that because, really, when have I EVER been “normal”? I’m the oldest of 9 children, I was a single, teen mom and have gone on to have a grand total of 9 children of my own. None of that fits society’s views of “normal”.

But surely my kids are normal. They’re all good-looking, read just fine, present themselves in a “normal” fashion when out-and-about, play sports and go to private schools where, if anything, everyone is normal or above normal. Geesh! Normal is certainly what my kids are.

Yeah right! As I’m being forced into clearer vision and thinking, I realize that my kids have always been slightly outside the societal norm. My oldest has chosen to pursue all of her higher education in faith-based schools-certainly not the norm for most. My oldest son struggled mightily with what “normal” was supposed to be. He always had strong ideas on what was right and what was wrong and that you should always be choosing to do what was right. I look back, with a heavy heart when I think of a note he wrote in 6th grade, telling his father and I that he was grateful for the Catholic education he was receiving, but that he was really having a very hard time with not having any friends. We encouraged him and pushed him through. He struggled with grades because of poor handwriting and downward-spiraling self esteem. He became angry and aggressive. And then God stepped in and introduced us to the right environment and peer group for him and within a few months he became happy, full of life and by all means, “normal” once again. Hmmm, environment changed everything. Changing our perception of where he “should” be or what sports he “should” be playing and trusting that we couldn’t provide all the answers, changed his whole life.

I could go on down the line, describing each of my children and the ways in which I perceive them as “normal” and the ways in which they are so much more than that. But really, I now need to focus on my 7th child. My 8yr old son.

I look back to bringing him home after his birth and how sensitive he was to all his environmental stimuli. He was coming to a home with 6 older siblings. 6 boisterous, outspoken and noisy siblings and this didn’t work well for him. Every time someone yelled or ran through the house with happy screeches, he would shake and cry. He couldn’t sit in the baby swing. The movement seemed to terrify him. TERRIFY! He only slept if he was directly on me or swaddled in my blanket or clothing (I learned to cover him in things that smelled of me). I asked questions of people I knew who worked in special education or had children with challenges of their own. But little by little we all seemed to develop coping mechanisms. I noticed that he started to become noisy if everything around him was noisy. I learned to tell him to look me in the eye when I was giving him directions and to have him repeat what I’d said. I learned to assign a number to each task and ask him to go through the numbers. I learned that riding a bike was frightening for him but that he could ride a scooter like nobody’s business. I learned that his fine-motor skills were low for his age and we stopped trying to buy shoes with laces. So, we learned to try to make it through each day with a minimum of challenge. But not everyone is his mom and not everyone is so accommodating or patient (I use “patient” loosely when describing myself) and he started to have real challenges in the classroom last year. He couldn’t grasp the concept of getting things done in a certain timeframe. His thoughts on any given subject were too big for the classroom discussions and he just can’t NOT say what’s going through his head. So he became frustrated at not completing things on time and with the fact that he has poor handwriting and he just decided to give up on doing the work all together. He started hiding his work or destroying it. This meant that his grades plummeted and he was put on academic probation. ~sigh~ It was just a downward spiral. Then he started 2nd grade. New teacher, new year. And she worked REALLY REALLY hard with him. We kept our communication open and discussed various ways to help him function within the classroom setting and finally we discussed getting him into counseling so that he could have better tools to draw from to perform successfully. His grades have been up. He’s not hiding work. Both the teacher and I, realized that he is more than capable with any of the work placed before him.  All in all, it’s a better year. But through the open communication between teacher, parent and counselor, it was suggested (strongly) that he be tested for Asperger’s. While I wasn’t totally surprised, I was challenged. I cried for 3 days. Not for myself, but for my child who possibly needed something more, something different and had been pushed through with the hope that he would finally “get it”. I spoke with a couple people and then had the testing scheduled.

We don’t have a full report back yet, but I’ve been given a partial report and he seems to fall, quite solidly, in the spectrum for Asperger’s. Yesterday I was told that according to the tests, he has an IQ of 156 (I placed a link here because until yesterday, I didn’t know what any IQ scores meant and am betting that most people are in the same boat I was) and that it’s suggested that he be placed in a more challenging school environment. This is where I have to fall back on what I learned with my older son (who was never tested for an “disorders” and has no diagnosis of any) about trusting that environment makes all the difference and where I have to let go of “normal”. I want what’s best for each of my kids. But I’m also having a tough time letting go. I will continue to read, research, talk and learn and I will continue to be human and fight my own ideas of “normal”. And, you can bet I’ll be talking about the whole thing as it unfolds.

Doing the Dance of the Children~

I’m writing this because I know there are plenty of parents out there that will read it, nod there heads and think, “Yep! Been there”. But mostly I’m gonna write it to release it from me and to feel better.

I hate having to punish my kids. I HATE IT! Why is it so necessary?! Why can’t I simply say, “you need to be quiet because Mommy’s in traffic and I need to concentrate on not getting in an accident. So just listen to the music and talk later.” and actually have them DO it?! Instead I have to make threats, turn around 15x, let them know that I can see them in my rear view mirror and I KNOW they are causing their siblings to scream.

Ugh!

This afternoon I made a dinner that I could easily pack up and take along so that the 3 youngest and I could head out to a swim meet for 1 of my girls and they could eat at a reasonable time and it wouldn’t cost me a bunch of $ eating out. After we were all back in the van, I gave each of the little ones their bowls with pasta, veggies and ground beef. This is when the naughtiness started (I’m ignoring the 1/2 hour of naughtiness before this). My 4yr old handed me his bowl and started telling me how much he hated the food. He went on and on about how he wanted something else and how terrible it was that I served him a “meal” that only had 3 ingredients. I let him know that not only did he not have to eat anymore of it, he wouldn’t be eating ANYTHING else for the rest of the night.

Then the fit started. He started throwing his shoes and socks and picked up papers and through them on the floor. I let him know that if it didn’t stop he would have a punishment when we got home. It subsided, a little.

We had to stop on the way home to pick up one of my kiddos that was at a playdate. I left the 3 little ones in the van with my 14yr old and went in to gather their brother. Next thing I know, I’ve got a call from the 14yr old letting me know that my 4yr old and 6yr old have gotten out of the van and are running up the street after neighborhood kids. To the van I went. I buckled them back in and told them that when we got home they would be putting on their pjs and heading to their rooms for 1/2 hr time outs.

This is where my 4yr old kicked it into high gear-He says to me, “that’s ok. I like being naughty. I’m not gonna stop being naughty and you’re the worst mom ever!”. And THAT’S where I let him know that he would be going to bed for the rest of the night.

So, we got home, I got him into his pjs, gave him the warning that he would either take his punishment and go to sleep or he would be facing bigger consequences. After about 30 minutes of kicking the wall and getting out of his room, I let him know that he would not be going to the birthday party he was looking forward to tomorrow.

This is where he started crying-Heartfelt sobs of, “If I don’t go then I won’t know what cake they have”.

I had to crack a smile over that one.

So that’s it-My journey through this afternoon/evening full of naughtiness. Guess what…I feel better! I had a feeling that if I wrote it all down and sipped a glass of wine while doing it, that by the end I would, surely, feel better!

Let’s see, it’s 7:30 pm. Can I go to bed once this glass of wine is finished? Parenting can be exhausting!

Doing the Dance of the Children~

Sometimes my kids really surprise me!

I have an older child that has been refusing to learn how to do laundry for the last few years. About a month ago that child came to me and asked me to please show them how to do the laundry. I uttered a prayer of thanks and proceeded to show them how. Ever since then, they’ve been knocking it out! But that’s not all!…

A few days ago that same kiddos told their 11 yr old sibling that it was time they learned to do the dishes and that they should come to the kitchen for a tutorial. The 11 yr old looked at me in disbelief and I let them know that it was INDEED time for this lesson and that it’s a vital life skill because they aren’t always going to live at home where Mom picks up the slack and dishes get pretty stinky after a few days. So the older sibling led the younger one in their 1st round of dish-doing.

How great is that?! There are so many times that I look around the house and wonder if anyone sees anything or if they just take for granted when things are picked up, put together and organized. It’s a great thing to get a little affirmation that these skills are, indeed, being learned. And it’s a really great thing when those skills and lessons get passed on unexpectedly from one sibling to another.

Good Stuff!

Doing the Dance of the Children and Feeling Proud of My Kiddos~